Tom Sucks

Everything sucks, but we can make it suck less

“I’m what they call, uh, you know, a power user.” May 16, 2006

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tom @ 3:17 pm

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I’m a software developer, but I also do IT at work because we’re not big enough to justify a full-time IT person. One of the IT duties is to purchase computers for new employees, usually a few days before their starting date so we can have a PC up and running when the new hire arrives.

This morning, I was pulled out of my important weekly development meeting – the only meeting that the developers hold, and the only one we ever attend – to come meet the new salesman. I was told he had a few problems with his computer, which had just arrived and was still in its box on my desk. This had better be good, I thought, to pull me out of this meeting.

NH: “Hi, I’m (New Hire). I understand you’ve ordered me a PC. What is it?”

Suck: Nice to meet you (etc.). Yes, we got you a Thinkpad T42. I’ll have it set up and ready in a few hours.

NH: “Wow! That’s great. But I wanted to let you know that I just bought three new laptops, you know, those good deals from… HP? Yeah, HP. What do they call their laptops? Anyway, they were only about a thousand bucks each. What’d you spend on this?”

Suck: About $1800, including Office SBE.

NH: “Wow, you got ripped off. These HPs are great…”

Suck: Are they as thin and light as the T42?

NH: “Oh yeah, they’re much better.” (Suck: :confused: yeah right) “Anyway, I can just use my own Office license, I have my own personal license for it.”

Suck: You have a license that’s legal to use here?

NH: “Yeah, I have my own legal license. I installed it on all of my computers at home. I’ll just put it on-”

Suck: No, that’s OK, you can just use the one that we bought with this computer.

NH: “Does it have Norton Utilities? I like to have Norton Utilities installed, since you don’t usually have a virus sc-”

Suck: We have a corporate license for AVG antivirus. Don’t worry, it’s part of the normal setup I do to every computer. You don’t need to install Norton-

NH: “Oh that’s OK, I’ll put Norton Utilities on there too. I like having Norton Utilities because I know how to use it, and I don’t want to use everything else. I just like to set everything up myself. I’m what they call, uh, you know, a power user.”

Suck: 😥

NH: “Oh and also, I’ll need one of those nice all-in-one printer scanner fax things for my home office. I’ll just pick one up at Best Buy, you know, these things are just 200 bucks for these great inkjet units, it’s incredible.”

Suck: Well, we don’t usually-

NH: “I’ll just go ahead and pick one of those up and expense it.”

Suck: Well before you do, you’ll have to clear it with-

NH: “Yeah, and I need a docking station. You know those things, they’re amazing, they have ports on them for your printers and you just slide the laptop into them, and it’s great. I have wires that I plug into it at home, and I can’t stand having to unplug wires each time I bring it somewhere. I won’t work without one, so you can go ahead and order that…”

Suck: Hold on, I have to approve purchases with-

NH: “Do you have any extra Verizon [EVDO] cards?”

Suck: We have a few that we share.

NH: “Well I’ll need one of those, too, so just toss that on the next order…”

Suck: :gonk:

I hate salespeople.

There’s nothing more dangerous, time-consuming, expensive, or annoying to an IT person than an idiot who mistakenly thinks he’s a power user.

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